égoïste

Friday, October 01, 2010

Basilica of Sainte-Anne-de-Beaupré.
Well it is official we have been in Quebec for almost 8 weeks! Wow how times flies. The time here has been able to bring us lots of adventures some arguments and moments of being cross eyed after coming home from class. But I would have to say so far that I love Quebec, all of its beauty and most of all its people.


I just want to talk a little bit about what the Lord has been teaching... so bear with me ^_^ 


Now some of you may know this but when you are doing 'something' in your life... by something I mean something out of the norm, something that everyone wishes they could do or wish that some one else would do and are really excited when they meet something that is doing it. But the fact is that we are doing 'something' if that something is doing the will of God, moving to Quebec to learn french, or going to Africa or well just getting married. People want to talk to you, they want to pick your brain be around and I love it I want to talk about how God has brought me to where I am and why we are here and share my love for Christ, but a big part of me wants to dig into that person but you cant just switch topics to something that deep that fast... and as everyone knows we have moved around quite a bit in the last year so we have had to say goodbye to a lot of really good friends and move on to make new ones (But thank the Lord for Skype) so all of this unless disciplined turns you into yourself and makes you think... well that your interesting. 


Inside St.Anne Basillica
But I guess to get to the point of what I am talking about, in our struggles in moving here and the situations that life and the Lord bring to the surface I have found my self being quite selfish... 


Asking myself questions like "What will I do about this?" "How is this going to effect me?" " What can I do to fix this and make it better?" "This language is so dang hard, how can I continue to do this?" And the fact is that all of those questions have a 'I' in it and ALL of those situations have other people in it other then myself! The Lord brought this to my attention when I was listening to a sermon on Jonah by Afshin Ziafat (awesome speaker if anyone wants to look him up) and well Jonah was being quite a selfish guy... and the Lord just turned me inward and asked me to look at my own heart, that in all of my questioning and developing of lots of plan "B"s (Which most of us are quite good at. Saying well if God doesn't come through.. or doesn't do what he promised; I'll do this!) I was not trusting him, I was lead to think of this verse: 



Basement Chapel

Philippians 2:3 "Do nothing out of rivalry or conceit, but in humility consider others as more important than yourselves." - The Bible 

Looking back and seeing all of those questions and seeing that I was only caring for myself and not for others showed me, that for a bit I had completely lost sight of the gospel (and that is a scary thing for ANYONE to do). For Jesus came and not caring for himself but giving HIMSELF up to wipe us clean of our sins so that we can spend eternity with him! And like one of my favorite verses says "Be Holy as I am Holy" 1 Peter 1:16 and its not that we can be holy on our own!  No! We need to trust on Jesus and when we are thinking of only ourselves we are not only not thinking about others better then ourselves but we are also not trusting and leaning on the Lord!


Reminder of
Gods Promise
So really JESUS is the interesting one, if you are doing 'something' and that something is for Jesus, the people want to dig into your life and my life because of the Jesus in me! Praise the Lord that he has grace and mercy in me to still want to live in me!  


And really this isn't something that i decided and its all over with, I have to realize every selfish thought take it and give it right to Jesus, and tell him that I am his; and I do this over and over and over again. All I can do is pray that one day he will bless me with the discipline and a heart like his to never think that way again. 


Amen


Proverbs 3:5-6

 Trust in the LORD with all your heart
       and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,


       and he will make your paths straight.

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